Friday, March 30, 2007

How to mess-up: A definite guide.

President Kalam visited BITS today.

The visit of _the_ President of the nation, particularly when he happens to be a distinguished scientist and an exemplary visionary should've been an awesome experience. It wasnt.

OK, this is partly a case of sour-grapes, since i wasn't 'allowed' to see him in person. 5000 persons simply cant fit into our auditorium meant for 1500, except of course if it's some event like Oasis Inaug or FashP. So, only 60 'lucky' ones from each hostel got the opportunity to see the great man in flesh.

So, what are the lessons i learnt from his visit. Well, firstly, it did not affect me in anyway. I did'nt even get to see his convoy, forget the chopper. But well, i definitely learnt what sort of a hell-hole i am in.

So, he arrives at 3 sharp, and begins addressing the audience. Thankfully, for us poor unlucky souls holed up in our rooms (cells?), there is a live broadcast on the common-room TV. Except that it is of atrocious quality. The main microphone (the president's obviously) wasn't tuned properly and the image quality was mediocre.

I guess one of the reasons he visited this place in the middle of nowhere was because it is a technical institute. Lets see how 'technical' this place really is.

First off, what was really shocking was the fact that there was simply no formal announcement of the visit by the institute. I came to know of it on 24th, but the lack of any notice made me suspicious. How was i to know whether this is not yet another of those rumours. I saw the first notice on 28th - indirectly referring to the visit, asking vehicle owners to register their numbers as a security precaution. Pretty neat an announcement for a major visit, eh? Simply no communication informing the students that a great mind is doing us a big favour by visiting - no email, nothing on the website. Students had to go to the presidentofindia website to confirm. I guess some people simply dont know how to use and update a website.

Anyways, they choose students pseudo-randomly, and put up a list on _one_ noticboard. Go see your name and collect your 'papers' from the warden. Pretty advanced, eh?

My only consolation lay in seeing scores of security personnel in the campus, knowing that the chances of another burglary were slimmer today.

Well, after a valiant effort to hear the speech, i trudge back to my room, seething with so much frustration it would make a Sith jealous. And voila! The speech, along with the answers to questions, is up online on _his_ website! His staff had put it up online in a matter of minutes! Why the hell wasnt the speech broadcasted on the network here, so that everyone could see it without the common-room TV messing up the whole experience? Why are transcripts not available on the BITS page? And why isnt the whole address uploaded ? If the president's staff can achieve such an amazing efficiency, why cant legions of people here (students as well as the staff) at least _try_ to match it? Whatever happened to this being a _technical_ institute of learning, where cutting edge technology is supposed to be developed? Haven't people here heard of Video over IP ? Or maybe

We had a whole big network at our disposal, all possible resources available - and what was the response? Nothing. Absolutely none. Just shamelessly sat around doing nothing. Well, not unless you count a news ticker on the bits homepage i just saw.."prez visits BITS", followed by " Another Golden Moment in the History of BITS.". To me, this is what it means: The President visited us today, for all those who were not aware, and just so you know we _really_ screwed up.

What else can it be? How can anyone explain the fact that there wasnt _any_ sensible information dispersal by the institute? The president talked about a lot of technical challenges in his address. Many were about information technology. What better way to insult his vision than to do the completely opposite by being as fast as a slug? Well, the 'news' will come, sure. But only after a day or two - in the usual pompous, yet drab style. I think i can accurately predict what it is exactly going to read like, but thats another matter. And then, perhaps, we will get the communication through notices / email - the President _visited_ us. He said 'XYZ'. Such and such questions were handpicked by _us_ to be asked. And almost none of them were _really_ worth asking to an outstanding scientist.

Well, i have a lot more to write, but i have loads of tests coming up. 'Tests' which are nothing but huge insults to the subject whose knowledge they are supposed to test. So i'll get goi^%$@@** NO CARRIER

PS: I know this piece is highly inflammatory and vitriolic. If you have _any_ views on the matter, please, _please_ do flame me.